(no subject)
Apr. 15th, 2011 05:08 pmI'm just whinging about writing, so ignore me.
That's I'm fiddling with so many things at the moment shows that I can't focus on anything. Torn between what I want, what I feel like I should be doing and what feels safe.
What I want is to have something finished that I can send out, that hasn't done the rounds already.
What I feel I should be doing is rewriting one of the first drafts I created last November, but it/they are so far from being finished that I can't get up the motivation to commit to it/them.
The safe option is to go back to a novel I put aside 2 or 3 years ago, because there's little emotional attachment but all the hard work has been done. But my heart's not in it. I did it aside, moved on etc.
And hanging over me, the one that I have "finished" but the thought of sending it out makes me cry, which is stupid, and I wish I'd never written the thing. It seemed like a easy writing project but then I found myself writing about things I knew nothing about (scary) and thing I knew a lot about but didn't feel comfortable writing about (scarier). It took me places I didn't want to go (and some I did, and enjoyed them). So there's a lot of emotional baggage here. And I know it'll be a hard sell : it's SF, but it's not; it's 110K; the story is straightforward, done to death, but that's the point of it; I played games that will probably annoy readers. I did have fun writing it and I would like to share it with other people. I think maybe I will keep it for myself and one day find a small press home for it But grrr, I do want something that is done.
And the seal book, of course. I think the reason I am avoiding that is becauseto handle it properly I need to write about things I'm not comfortable writing about. I want feedback before I do anything more on it.
So that is why I'mnot a happy person at the moment grumbling about writing a lot lately.
That's I'm fiddling with so many things at the moment shows that I can't focus on anything. Torn between what I want, what I feel like I should be doing and what feels safe.
What I want is to have something finished that I can send out, that hasn't done the rounds already.
What I feel I should be doing is rewriting one of the first drafts I created last November, but it/they are so far from being finished that I can't get up the motivation to commit to it/them.
The safe option is to go back to a novel I put aside 2 or 3 years ago, because there's little emotional attachment but all the hard work has been done. But my heart's not in it. I did it aside, moved on etc.
And hanging over me, the one that I have "finished" but the thought of sending it out makes me cry, which is stupid, and I wish I'd never written the thing. It seemed like a easy writing project but then I found myself writing about things I knew nothing about (scary) and thing I knew a lot about but didn't feel comfortable writing about (scarier). It took me places I didn't want to go (and some I did, and enjoyed them). So there's a lot of emotional baggage here. And I know it'll be a hard sell : it's SF, but it's not; it's 110K; the story is straightforward, done to death, but that's the point of it; I played games that will probably annoy readers. I did have fun writing it and I would like to share it with other people. I think maybe I will keep it for myself and one day find a small press home for it But grrr, I do want something that is done.
And the seal book, of course. I think the reason I am avoiding that is because
So that is why I'm
